THE FANDOM HIGHTIMES: VOLUME 3, 5th EDITION!

[peter--parker.livejournal.com]

PETER SPEAKS:

We're in November now and you know what that means. Excitement. Food. Turkey. Basketball. Politicians.

But the most important thing it attracts is talk of ponies. Yes, weeks after I called out for the Pony Rewards System to be implemented I still haven't seen a significant increase in the presence of ponies on the island. This school administration is simply ignoring a revolutionary system for no obvious reason other than budget, space, and sanity. Well that's just wrong. It is up to we the students to protest this lack of ponies. We must have a pony protest! Somebody needs to make the signs, somebody needs to pick a location, and I'll continue writing about it when I have nothing else for my editorial.









After last week's adventurous meeting, Professor Lyman assured everyone that anyone thinking there wasn't a meeting due to him hiding after an unfortunate gremlin bite was just wrong. Mostly we discussed ideas for the rest of the semester. Both arson and orgies were mentioned, and I have to say I think the school board might have a problem with both those things.

You may be able to look forward to a fundraiser or two, and those without plans for Thanksgiving this year might not have to worry, thanks to your Student Council. Of course, anyone from anywhere that doesn't have Thanksgiving may need it explained to them. Look for further details closer to the date, since we're probably still recovering from Halloween and all. Let's try to work off some of those calories before we think about adding new ones.



HALLOWEEN: A LOOK BACK
By Katara

Last week we celebrated the holiday of Halloween. Which, as far as it seems to me, is only an excuse to get candy. But hey! Candy! I'm totally good with it. I think when I go back home, I'm going to try to import it. And chocolate. And televisions (but that only for Sokka).

Another feature of the Fandom High Halloween seemed to be the people having parts turned into pumpkins. But we took care of, and hopefully everyone has returned back to normal. Or at least to the way they were pre-pumpkining. The culprit was an evil gourd that called to a person and turned him (names redacted to protect the guilty party) into a Pumpkinheaded Horseman. I believe the horse has recovered well. As has the one who used to have a pumpkin for a head.

Now I'm wondering. Is there a holiday called chocolate day? And if not, can we invent it?



STUDYING 101: 7 BASIC STUDY TIPS
By Peter Parker

Hello, my fellow students. As a senior who gets good grades and some space to fill in the paper, I feel that it is my duty to help you however I can. This week that means the first in a series of articles that will try to help you get better grades.

Tip 1: Select the necessary books. This may be a book that you've been assigned to read or your notebook, or just some reference book on the subject.

Tip 2: Eliminate distractions. Television, music, video games, significant others... They're just going to distract you. Some people may focus better with some background noise, but as soon as you start paying more attention to that than the studying, it's time to get rid of that distraction.

Tip 3: Stay away from gremlins. They may sneak up on you while you're distracted and bite you, wasting much of your study time. I suggest studying in full chain mail or plate armor.

Tip 4: Avoid study groups. You'll probably end up fighting monsters.

Tip 5: Also avoid the library. There's a lot of talking in there.

Tip 6: Hopefully you took good notes in the first place. If not, just steal someone else's notes.

Tip 7: You know what? Just forget about it. There's too much to read. Go to Caritas, get drunk, sing something, and guess when test time comes.

Good luck studying!



The Fine Print
By Peter Parker

You don't study on Chocolate Day.



Coffee Pin-Up







credits:

editor: Peter Parker
words: Cher Horowitz, Katara, Peter Parker
pictures: The fabulous Chloe Sullivan, the amazing Rory Gilmore, the modest Peter Parker, the great Rikku, and the magnificent Google
adviser: Steve Rogers

Questions? Comments? Complaints? Send a letter to the editor: letters.fhightimes@fandomhigh.edu